Tag Archives: date

The First Valentines Day Together is Pretty Awkward…

it really is.

When you’re in that “what are we” phase of the relationship, where it’s still new or just not really defined yet…Valentines day can get awkward as shit.

Too little she’s pissed, too much she’s scared. It’s almost a no win situation for the guy. How much do you discuss it beforehand? Does she lie and think it’s a big deal? You never know.

Some people are big birthday people. I’ve never been that guy. Some people LOVE them some birthdays, and will spend an entire week celebrating their day. I couldn’t care less about it, and truthfully, I forgot about my birthday entirely this last year when it fell on a meaningless Wednesday in the middle of a long work week. I didn’t even go out for my traditional steak dinner (which I treat myself to every year).

If your newly acquired significant other is a big “birthday person” you better believe he/she is going to be a big Valentines day person.

The best thing you can do is ask them to describe their last birthday to you. That’s a sneaky way to figure out if you’re going to have to break the bank on V-Day or not.

Always remember: Never set the bar too high on your first Valentines Day together.

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Salsa’s Perfect First Date Suggestion.

I’m a serial dater. It’s a problem, but I’m at peace with it. Serial dating is awesome in college, but it becomes less awesome as time moves on. Unfortunately, I just haven’t met “the one” quite yet.

When you’re a serial dater, you go on a LOT of first dates. First dates set the tone for any potential relationship, so you always want to knock it out of the park with a good first impression. Back when I was in college, I designed the absolute best first date for people to use from any background. I’ve always received good feedback from people, so I decided to share it with the blogworld for any of you looking for potential date ideas and suggestions. Here’s my go-to first date blueprint if I really like the girl, and want to impress her.

tennis cutie

Phase 1: The Activity.

Do something marginally athletic, and let her win if possible. I chose tennis as my go to meetup activity. I’m not good at tennis at all, but its an easy enough sport where you can teach her how to volley and the rules if she doesn’t know. It’s fun and harmless, and you want to do something that won’t be too physically daunting. Tennis is just a suggestion- this phase could really be anything, but stick to keeping it to just you and her, so that you’ll have time to get to know each other. After your done with this activity, suggest that you get some food (something casual but good- have a couple places in mind that do good takeout). Move on to Phase 2.

pizza to go

Phase 2: The Food.

Once the activity ends, move it straight to food. Schedule the activity for late in the afternoon, so it will end around dinnertime. It’s an easy transition, and it keeps a casual vibe. My go to was a hole-in-the-wall pizza place with the best pizza slices to go. All girls love pizza, so it’s a no brainer. With the food in hand, suggest that you go back to your place to eat it. If she’s uncomfortable with it, suggest her place to get a feel for her interest level and trust in you. Keep in mind that where you decide to go is irrelevant because you’re not actually going there (see phase 3).

Young couple on a rooftop having a romantic dinner --- Image by © Matthias Tunger/Corbis

Phase 3: Shock and Awe.

This is where it gets good. On the way to your selected location, suggest that you have a better idea, and you know of a good picnic spot. This has to be done tactfully to make sure she feels at ease being a little surprised (but by this point you’ve built up enough trust with her). The secret spot is actually rooftop somewhere where you’ll have special private access to. But Salsa, how do I find a secret spot? This steps requires your lazy ass to do some pre-date scouting for the best rooftop spot you can find and get private access to. Once you find a good possible location, you may have to grease a few palms to get some rooftop access, but do what you got to do to get it done. Once you have rooftop access, you can set up a little table and keep some crackers, cheese, wine, champagne, and water in a little cooler up there along with two chairs, a candle and small light. Make sure to have the secret spot set up and ready to go before meeting her for tennis. The trick to this phase is to try and time it perfectly right so that you can watch the sunset together while you eat. Once she sees your roof top setup, most women melt right there on the spot because they always appreciate someone going the extra mile on a date. From there, you can enjoy your pizza slices/burgers/sushi/whatever together on the roof while you chat about life and get a little tipsy watching the sun disappear. After that, it’s up to you to move to the final phase of the date which I’d usually suggest as a movie at my place (or hers if she’s more comfortable there). If you’ve followed the blue print and aren’t a complete weirdo, you won’t be watching much of that movie. Now you’re ready to move on to phase 4.
Random tip: I used to keep a big booklet of DVD’s in the trunk of my car which I’d ‘stumble across’ as I packed up the chairs and table. I’d take out and say “oh I must have left these in here”, then I’d always ask her to pick out something she hadn’t seen, or I’d make some suggestions. Keep in mind that I went to college in the pre-Netflix-on-demand days, so having a good library of DVD’s was essential.

phase 4

Phase 4: Close the deal.

Get her back to your place (or hers), and seal the deal. You may want to get a nightcap if your still thirsty, but I’d always put on movie (usually a rom-com) and try move the party into the bedroom as fast as possible. Make sure your pad is spotless and that the fridge is stocked because you don’t want anything standing in the way of your perfectly executed evening.

And there you have it. Salsa’s perfect first date. I hope this helps someone get laid. Good luck out there boys.