Category Archives: technology

A while ago I came up with this idea

I have a lot of million dollar ideas, but the other day I was sitting at a bar and I turned around, and there it was! My idea from about 6 years back just hanging on the wall staring right back at me. “Fuck” I thought…There it is. Another wasted opportunity.


My idea: 5 hour energy drink vending machines. You put them in gas stations, strip clubs, bars, rest stops, and every office in the world. Buy the energy shots in bulk for a dollar a bottle and sell them for 3. Bing Bang Boom. Profit

The actual product: It was like a tiny gas station vending machine that looked like a metal safe, and it was about 2 feet wide and 3 feet high. It sold 5 hour energy’s, asprin, some small candy, condoms, cologne, and some other small gas-station type items. It was absolutely unreal. My idea. My millions. All gone to the creator of this beautiful machine.

I did some research, and I think the company is called Vengo, it’s like a digital vending machine, but it’s a cool concept. Basically: they have a touch screen interface, accept credit card payments, they focus on selling gas station type items, can hold up to 6 different items and a total of 100 things.They were actually on Shark Tank too. Here’s the pitch:

Getting 2 sharks on board always means you have an idea with some serious potential.

Time will tell if these guys succeed or fail, but I’ll be pulling for them.






These Apps Are Nuts.

Editors note: I wrote this blog 8 months ago, but never published it. I found it interesting enough to revisit and publish. 

Maybe I’ve fallen a little behind the technology curve, but I was discussing some new apps with a few buddies last night, and they were telling me about some real interesting ones.

Maybe you’ve heard of these, and maybe you haven’t. I wouldn’t be a man of the people if I didn’t pass these along to you. Enjoy.


Kitchen Surfing–

A chef comes to you, cooks, brings his own ingredients, and appliances, cleans up, and leaves in 30 minutes. You set the time. I actually blogged about it here.

task-rabbitTask Rabbit–

Send out a task that you need completed, set a price you’ll pay, and someone will do it for you.


Brings you whatever you need in 30 minutes. Focused on convenience store type items, and the advantage is that they’re open late and fast.


On demand alcohol delivery and expert tips on cocktail making. This is a liquor store in your pocket.thirstie.jpg


drizly.jpegBeer, wine, and liquor, delivered to your door in under an hour. Another liquor store in your pocket.


Another beer/wine/liquor delivery company promising 30-60 minutes or less.

Postmates- another food delivery app that focuses on fast food
and lower scale restaurants for those on a budget. In my opinion, Postmates is the best of all the on demand delivery apps, but it is very  similar to GrubHub, Uber Eats, and Seamless. If you live in a big city ypostmates.pngou’ll have a ton of options, but if not, you’re kinda screwed.

if all else fails, use Magic–

Magic claims that if you text a number with any request they’ll get it done for a price.

Yes I listed a bunch of delivery apps, but I just didn’t know that these were that wide spread. Currently many of them are only available in big cities, so I listed multiple ones that may be available in your area of the country.




Salsa tried to “keep up with the Jonses'”and now he has an Amazon Echo Dot that he has no idea what to do with.


Ever heard of the echo dot? me neither, until about 2 weeks ago.

Some gas-bag at work was going off about how cool they are and how they’re so hard to get your hands on, so I took the bait. I found out a back end way to buy one, so I did. I bought it mainly just to shut his dumbass up, and it worked. But now the jokes on me, because I’ve spent 90 bucks on a glorified hockey puck with a speaker/microphone.

Today when I get home I have this thing sitting on my doorstep.

I have no clue what to even begin to use this thing for.

If you know, let me know.

Echo dot.jpeg

Salsa PSA: Stop Snapchatting Live Concerts and Clubs

I’m officially becoming an old man.

I love Snapchat… that’s no secret. I’m not big on Periscope, but I do love me some Snapchat. I’m known to fire off way too many stupid snaps on any given weekend.

With that said, I have never in my life sent a video snap from a live show, concert, or a loud night club. Why would I?

concert snap2

The audio quality is so shitty on those snaps, that it drives me up a wall.

I used to be able to avoid those people who would constantly send snaps from live shows and night clubs, but now that Snapchat has changed the story mode to automatically cycle to the next person’s story, I get bombarded with 7-10 second bursts GHSHHSHHASHSHSHSHHSH DUMM DUMM (muffled screams) SSHHHHHHHHHH between pictures of Beautiful Italian scenery, and delicious sizzling food.

I understand that people need everyone to know that they were standing in the 3rd row at the latest Beyonce concert, but for the love of God can you please limit your snaps to pictures only? I don’t want to  have to cycle through 20 horrible sound clips of static popping while I enjoy my morning recap of my friends weekend activities.

::End rant::


eating an apple



Sean Parker, the Napster guy, has a new company that wants to charge you $50 to rent a movie

That headline is not a joke.

Sean Parker, aka the Napster guy aka Zuckerburg’s boy, is trying to start up a new company with his dumbest idea yet.

He wants to charge people $50 to rent a movie that’s currently in theaters.

What planet are you on bro?

You think people are going to shell out 50 bones when they can go to the theater for 7-8 bucks?

GTFO ari

I’m a strong believer that once you get rich, you lose your perception of reality. There is no shot in hell that the average American is going to see any value in this bullshit company/product. People like Sean Parker are so far off the reservation, that it’s genuinely insulting. This guy is worth 3 Billion dollars?!? My goodness. As a guy who’s worth about 3 dollars, even a stupid blogger, like myself, can see how much this idea sucks. The worst part, is that he’ll blow a couple million dollars, shrug his shoulders and walk away like it was nothing more than a minor inconvenience.

I wish that Parker would have to match every dollar he sinks into this project with a donation to charity or something. That should be a rule for the mega-rich (billionaires and higher). Every awful idea, should be subject to the “bad idea tax”, which would require them to donate a match of yearly losses to charity until the company becomes profitable.

Bad idea tax. Making the world a better place, one shitty idea at a time.

Need it.




This “Personal Chef” App is an Awesome Concept


The app is called Kitchen Surfing

It’s an app where a chef will come to you, cook, clean, and leave all in 30 minutes. He brings all his cooking appliances, and ingredients too.

rock clapping.gif

Just a fantastic idea. I love it. I have some doubts about the actual logistics, pricing, menu options, and scalability of ‘Kitchen Surfing’ but it’s still an awesome concept.

Quick Questions that popped in my head:

  • Where do you find the chefs?
  • What do you charge? One price?
  • What do you cook? Customizable?
  • What if the food sucks?
  • What if you get robbed?
  • What if they break something?

The one thing I have issue with is that they say it’s “under $30.00” a person. So what, does that mean it’s $29.99 per person!??! That may be a good value for a place like NYC or San Francisco, but in my neck of the woods, you can get a pretty nice steak dinner at a restaurant for 60 bucks + tip. That brings up another question: do you tip this personal chef?? I would assume that you do, but is it like Uber where tip is included and you have the option to pay additional at the end? What if the chef burns your food? Are you eligible for a discount if it tastes awful/under-cooked?kitchensurfing.png

It just seems like so many things could go wrong, not to mention the fact that you’re letting a complete stranger into your home for a good amount of time. It doesn’t bother me, because I own nothing of value, but if I were an investment banker with a penthouse apartment in Manhattan, I’d be a little uneasy about opening my doors to some teenage chef from the local culinary institute down the street.

It will be very interesting to see where this app goes in the next few months/years. I see it going 1 of 2 ways:

  1. The app becomes a massive hit and becomes an industry leader and pioneer in the”on-demand at home food service”space . (I’d say about 5% shot)
  2. The app struggles to grow and acquire the necessary investment needed to become relevant, and it eventually dies before getting any traction. (I’d say about 95% chance)

Again, the idea is fantastic. There is a market for this. Hopefully they can make it more affordable because the $30/price point is going to be tough to get widespread adoption outside of big cities. We’ll keep an eye on this app to see how it progresses, but I wanted you to know about it early just in case it becomes the next huge thing.


If you’ve used this app (or know someone who has) hit me up on Twitter @Salsastoolie and let me know how it went.

Skarp Razor is suspended by KickStarter after raising more than 4 million dollars: Salsa Eats Crow

September 29th 2014:
“I can’t buy stock in these guys fast enough. Don’t let me down Skarp.”-Salsa

I always claimed to be a guy that could sniff out a good scam, but today I’ve been severely humbled. I’m eating a big ol slice of humble pie and it doesn’t taste very good.

Before we get into this, lets back track a little bit to get you up to speed on this Skarp Razor.

About two weeks ago, I wrote this glowing review of a revolutionary laser razor that was set to disrupt the entire shaving industry. Go back and check it out. Pretty cool right? I thought so. The razor went on to raise more than 4 million dollars in 2 weeks before KickStarter came in and promptly suspended the campaign because they didn’t have proof of a working prototype. That means everyone who backed the project will get a full refund and the project is cancelled forever.

Some dude on reddit with way too much time on his hands wrote this fascinating investigative post which called out all the flaws in the Skarp Razor. It does a great job explaining everything that was shady about the project. Shortly after his post started gaining attention the project was suspended and shut down on Kickstarter.

But guess what? The Skarp razor team just opened up a campaign on a similar ‘less-restrictive’ crowdfunding site called Indiegogo and people are still throwing money at them. How dumb is society today? “Oh that was a scam? Oh well, I still think it’s a cool idea- Here’s my money again!”


Now $300,000 ain’t no 4 mill… but money is money. That’ll still buy a few nice cars or boats for the Skarp crew to ride around in. It goes without saying, but if people are this brainless they deserve to be scammed out of their money.

I have officially ‘jumped the Skarp’ on funding any Kickstarter projects from here on out. High risk, low reward investments are not my cup o’ tea. Now cue the face Daymon, give me that face one more time!!