Dive Bar Tales.

Editors note: This blog was a draft that was never posted. I found it and figured it was entertaining enough to post. Enjoy!

Sometimes it’s good to escape the chaos of everyday life. People are very different across the board. Some people do drugs, some people go to church, some people write blogs, but I like to go to dive bars. I don’t have any kids, or real responsibilities, so I like to go to dives to pass the time. Dive bars are my therapeutic sanctuary.

Whenever I move to or visit a new place, I always check out the dive bars first. You’ll always find the most authentic people with the best recommendations.

You’d be amazed at the stories people tell you.

Last night wasn’t a very good story, but it was just an odd sequence of events.

I went to the bar to watch the Rockets/Mavs Game.
The bar was packed with people ages 45-65.
The guy next to me knew everything about all three bartenders.
The guy next to him was Loaded with “oil money” as he explained it.

The reason for this blog is because I want to show the value of not judging a book by it’s cover.

Normally, I would have dismissed these two guys right away, but they were sitting right by me at the bar, so I wasn’t going to be an asshole. One guy was talking about the game, clearly he knew little about basketball but I appreciated the effort. He then got into talking about his life.

Here’s what I remember about “Leeland” (forgot his real name, so I’ll go with Leeland)
1. He has 3 girlfriends
2. Only texted the wrong girl once in the last 2 weeks. That was a “huge accomplishment” for him (his own words, not mine)
3. He had a girl flying in the next day.
4. showed me a pic of her, and she actually didn’t seem bad looking for him- it was plausable. He also said “now I’m a 55 year old guy with some mileage- not a young buck like yourself”
5. The girl was from Louisiana, and was a good chef, and was going to be in town for 10 days.
6. “10 days of cookin and fuckin” (again-his words not mine)
7. He bought me a few beers, and then told the bartender that “he vouched for me” (more on that later)

Now lets talk about this Bartender.

Holy shit she was hot. Not your normal, blonde hair, makeup, blue eyes, tan, & perfect features type hot, but actually very different. This girl had red hair a few freckles, blue eyes, glasses, was very fit and had a phenomenal rack. I know you’re probably thinking ‘ew redheads are pale and gross looking’, but I assure you that this girl was a knockout. I don’t know what it is about thin chicks with huge tits that get me, but she was a stunner. She had every guy in there wrapped around her fingers and she knew it. She was wearing a very low cut shirt and made sure to bend over as much as possible. She looked very similar to this chick:
redhead bartender

I go to a lot of Dive Bars, and I hear a lot of weird stories.


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