Here’s some audio from the Dan LeBatard Show of a radio guy Chris Russo with the best rants I’ve ever heard.
This clip is calling out Tom Brady’s dad, and it’s absolutely magnificent:
YA SON GOT NAILED!
KEEP YA FREAKIN’ MOUTH SHUT!
AHHH COME ON THE GUY CHEATED FOLKS-LETS BE HONEST!
PUT THAT GUY ON!
BETTER YET PUT HIS SON ON. PUT HISSSS SOOOONNNN ONNNNNNN!
SAY THAT TO ME. SAY IT TO ANYBODY! SAY IT TO SOOOMMMMEEEBODDDYYY!
Best. Rant. Ever. Ranting against Tom Brady’s dad of all people. Not an athlete, not an analyst, but an athletes father (who apparently lives in a “bubble”). Grandpa Brady. Russo’s rant is exactly how I envision the angry internet trolls sounding. Keyboard warriors working themselves into an irrational anger just yelling at the walls in the twitter echo chamber with the exact same passion and anger as Russo had in this rant.
My favorite part of the rant was “STAY LOW”. Such an awesome veiled threat. Telling someone to stay low has got to be one of the most phenomenal threatening lines in history. I’ve never heard that phrase before, and now I want to use it all day, every day, on blogs, every way. Telling someone to stay low implies that they’re being a bitch, while you aren’t afraid to bring out the heavy artillery. Those two simple words strung together can take any interaction from 0-100 real quick. Love it.