Survivor (Season 30?!) is an awesome show- and it premiered tonight.

I love Survivor. Judge me all you want, but it’s true. I’ve been a survivor fan since day one. I still remember Richard Hatch taking the million in season one and being shocked when Colby didn’t take down the million in the Outback. They’ve had some great seasons and they’ve had some really shitty seasons over years, but it’s a fantastic hour of television every week. People may not realize it, but Survivor is the show that started reality TV.

There’s been so many great characters over the years, and so many different ways to play the game. I fell like I have the best method to how to play the game.

Salsa’s fool proof 5 step process to winning Survivor:
1. Blend in like a wall flower until the merge.
2. Never assume a leadership roll.
3. Don’t say anything controversial- just be a “yes man” for the first half of the show.
4. Identify the “leader’s best ally”- befriend them (if you’re that guy, you’ve already lost)
5. You have to win immunity challenges at the end of the game- there are always about 2 challenges at the end you have to win. Win those and you’ll win the million. Easy Peasy.

My favorite 2 players in survivor history were Boston Rob and Russel Hantz. These dudes were such great TV that the show brought them both back for one of the better seasons of recent memory called Survivor Redemption Island (which rob eventually won).
rob and russell

boston rob 4 kids
Boston Rob was just a mans man. The dude was scrappy as hell and won every immunity challenge ever. He was an earlier character on the show, and he was so good that they kept inviting him back. He eventually got married to Amber who was also a contestant on the show they have 4 baby girls now. That’s nuts. I just realized that Rob wrote a book, and you’re out of your mind if you think I’m not getting it. That’s why I love the blogging game. Look for a follow up book report blog on the book below. book of rob

On the opposite end of the spectrum you have Russel Hantz who was more entertaining, but way less of a physical dominant type of player. Rob was a good guy and great at challenges, and Russell was almost the polar opposite, but they both had phenomial social games. Russell was a snake, a liar, very sharp, and played two steps ahead of everyone else which is why everyone loved him. If you could combine the best of Rob with the best of Russell, you would have an unbeatable survivor contestant.

Little known fact, but Salsa actually applied to be on Survivor 4 years ago. The application process is lengthy and requires a 3 minute video submission plus a ton of other forms. Unfortunately, he didn’t even get to the second round of the selection process. Maybe it’s time to apply again now that I have this wildly successful blog under my belt. I was actually recently told (by someone on a past season) that they like to cast models and actors and give them roles to play, because prettier people make better TV. Can’t argue with that. Check out the difference in the cast from season 1 and the cast from season 30

Survivor Season 1 cast:
seaosn 1 cast surv
I’d crush that fucking field of softies.

Season 30 cast:
season 30 cast surv
Pecs and abs EVERYWHERE!

PS- Does Jeff Probst sneakily have the best job in America? Just hanging out in these exotic places for 40 days at a time, ref a couple challenges, ask a few questions, put out a few fires and that’s it. Hell of a life for Mr Probst. Props Probst, Props.
probst you sly dog
crazy eyes probst


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